COVID Chronicles- An Unexpected Journey

Well, yeah, all of this is some amount of unexpected. Unless you’ve been studying inevitable population boom/bust ecology and internally mantra-ing “society is 9 meals from anarchy”. But I still didn’t expect 2020. *refills Zoloft*

Ok, muchh better. Anyway, I wanted to recount something from a couple days ago that brought up some unexpected musings. Yeah man, I NOE u here for it.

Costumes Abound

We like to take an almost daily walk now, as many of you do as well. Fresh air, a bit of necessary movement, and soaking in the Big D- it’s a trifectal win. Well the other day, on our normal 15 min stroll, Arya had a meltdown (absolutely NOT induced by the previous 3 nights’ lack of sleep… like def not). Papa Bear walked her back to the abode, screaming for all of Westy to hear (Arya, not Steve).

Pre-Meltdown

So Des and I continued on. Past the big fluffy pine tree on the corner, the adjacent rocky driveway, and finally to “the ramp” that the Twinado just loveeees running down. We’re easily amused, at least. Upon our return, my son and I held hands and counted aloud the marked out parking spots in the complex next to ours. 66.. 67… 68…. 69.. utt! They skipped a spot for 70; that’s strange. Here we go again- 70, 71, 72, ooo look there’s no car in 73. And so on. As we entered the 80’s, laced with Salon Selectives and questionable Alf cartoons, a woman opened her apartment door and approached us. I felt a millisecond Enneagram 6 / safety flinch, instinct telling me to scoop up Des and bolt our a$$es home. But then “normal”, 1/2 social ambivert me kicked in and I stood there, politely smiling as she walked closer.

She wanted to draw our attention to the adorable teddy bears she had placed in her window- as 9 News thoughtfully instructed her to do- with hopes of cheering up her neighbors and passersby. She stood about 3 feet from us. Normally, of course, I wouldn’t care, but I kept trying to find ways to position us with a more generous buffer. She happily commented on our parking spot number proclamations and finished up her thoughts. I thanked her for the stuffed animal alert and we promptly turned to finish up our walk.

Then, however, the woman’s neighbor walked out with a white bag and asked for us to wait a second. If I thought the FIRST safety recoil was intense, this one certainly eclipsed it. She explained she had some new kids’ toys that she wanted to find a use for and began doling them out to Des.

Now….. normally…………….. like, anything prior to 3.5 weeks ago……… I would have been as elated as my Cat-Boy-dressed 5 year old was with an armful of unexpected silly putty, dino claws, and bouncy balls. It was like straight up serendipitous Christmas in March up in here.

However, my newfound virus germ mindset went from relatively stable to WHERE’S THE GOT DANG DECONTAMINATION ZONE, Y’ALL in less than 2 secs. Omg. Outwardly, I kept my ever-twitching smile and thanked her profusely. After all, it was a kickass deed she had just passed to us. We laughed, we made semi-acquaintance, and she told me not to worry as the toys were bought pre-quarantine.

Des and I now continued our walk home as my mind ran through the next 30 minutes- okay…. I’ll call Steve to open the door so we don’t use our hands, then we’ll— “Des, please don’t touch your face”— put the toy bag on the back porch while— “yeah I know, usually Mommy doesn’t care at allllllll about germs but we’re just being extra safe right now”— I’ll disinfect everything with the wipes we have. We’ll throw Des’ clothes into— “ughhh, Des, I know the mask is annoying but please try not to touch your face, okay?”— the wash and he can get a shower. I THINK that should cover everything. “Wow, that was SO nice of that woman, huh? We don’t even know her! And now you have some cool new toys.” Keeping up appearances is paramount with a small child in a pandemic. 😉

I confirmed my germ busting plan with Steve after I stood in front of him blabbering about how quickly it happened and how awkward it would’ve been if I turned it down and sped away (which is, of course, what my instinct told me to do). Bag held up high in my right hand.

We set to work. Des stripped down and showered while I spent 15 minutes intricately sanitizing everything on the back patio. Luckily I’ve had some experience with “contaminated” gloves so I felt confident in the process, diligent to not spread anything further. Thanks, poop- and bacteria-filled prairie dog field tech internship. Oh and all of those groundwater monitoring / sampling experiences under my belt. On hindsight, I probably could’ve just used my hands and washed them afterwards. Ha.

Juicy.

Once I felt confident that everything was clean, I pushed the toy bag deep into our own trash bag and properly doffed the gloves I had been using. I stripped and showered and felt relatively okay again. Except for the fact that I just put on a shirt I really like, and into the wash it went again. Dammit.

I realize how “extra” this sounds. But did we really spend the last 15 days self-isolating, to flatten the curve and give our hospitals a slightly better chance, just to become infected by a package of mini legos? (COVzz lasts 3 days on plastic and even if that very nice woman isn’t exhibiting symptoms, she could still be infected). If you’re going to go in, you gotta go alllllllll in baby. It’s just science. I don’t have to convince -my- household of this, but I know there are still millions across the country who would look at me up, down, and sideways like “where dat padded cell”…. (at this point I could probably make use of one, to be fair. Just not for germ-adverse reasons).

But my point here isn’t to convince the ignorant that we collectively aren’t taking this seriously enough. It actually got me thinking about how our frontline workers- medical staff, grocery employees, emergency personnel, and delivery people must feel every second of the day. I can hobbit-hermit myself inside for days on end with relative ease, but they cannot. How terrifying must that be? To consider every encountered surface, every human interaction, door knob, piece of equipment, and nearby sneeze particle. To wonder if some tiny invisible demon landed somewhere it shouldn’t. And would that cost me my life? The life of my husband, aunt, parent, friend? I honestly do not know how they do it all day and I bow down like a mom of twins to a mom of quads would. Now imagine doing all of that without the proper PPE, because a crazed country bought up all of the strongest masks. TERRIFYING.

This isn’t anything new or baffling, but it thought it intriguing to experience for myself instead of merely reading about in another Buzzfeed article. Luckily I had disinfectant wipes, patio containment zone, and a low stake situation on my side. To our frontline employees: I do so hope you find the strength and courage to continue doing what you’re doing. The inexperienced thank you each and every day. At least, most of us do. You all rock beyond words. Please go fetch yourselves one of the free coffee drinks or treats that businesses are offering to you during this time. It’s nowhere near enough, but it’s something I guess.

Now I’m getting that favorite shirt out of the dryer and sending the most positive of unicorn-puppy-rainbow-alpaca vibes to those who deserve money, praise, and comfort far beyond what we can give them.